Preheat

Four years. Four years is what it has taken to get to the step we are at now. But let’s not jump right to the present, I’ll tell you a little bit about how long I had my oven set to preheat for…

(Fair warning when I said a little, I really meant a lot. We were set to Preheat for quite a long while.)

Brandon and I got married January 20, 2013, one of the best days of my life. A few months before that I had decided that I was tired of taking the pill and wanted to try something different, something that would allow me to not get pregnant for up to three years AND I didn’t have to take anything daily for it (win win). I went to the doctor and got myself a handy dandy hormone implant into my arm, called Implanon. I had my own issues with my body rejecting it, having to get another placed in my other arm and then a hell of a time getting it out of my arm once I decided I was done. We had heard that it could take six months up to a year before my hormones would regulate after removing the Implanon, so a few short months after we got married we decided to go ahead and take it out.

From there we decided we would do the whole, not not try to get pregnant gig. If it happened then great, if it didn’t then not a big deal! Little did we know it wouldn’t happen for well over that 6-12 month period. Approaching about a year of no monthly cycles and no pregnancy to blame that on, I decided I would go see my OBGYN to figure out what our next step was.

For about three months she decided to put me on Metformin, Clomid, Estrogen and Progesterone to see if we could stimulate my body into ovulating and potentially getting pregnant. Three months of hormone induced tears, anger and hot flashes went by, with no sign of being pregnant. What a waste. Was I really going to put myself and let’s face it, my husband through all of this again and again? We both came to the conclusion that we would take a break from the meds, I would try to lose some weight and relax (apparently stress and weight are not conducive to making a baby) and see what happens next.

Another year passed and no baby Serio to speak of. Depression felt like it was starting to set in on me. I was SO upset that we hadn’t become pregnant yet. Everyone always would say to me, “You’re so young, don’t worry about it,” “Oh you’ve only been married a few years so you should enjoy each other for longer,” “Have you tried X, Y, Z yet? It worked for so-in-so,” and my least favorite response “In God’s time it will happen.” So you’re telling me that God doesn’t want me to be blessed with a baby right now? That everyone else around me can and not to mention more than once, but I for whatever reason am not allowed? Ok…

So here we are, year three. I decided to go back to my OBGYN and give the timed intercourse with meds another try. After a few cycles the doctor suggested I get a test done, HSG, to determine if anything was wrong with my fallopian tubes which wouldn’t allow the eggs and/or sperm to travel through them. She also recommended that Brandon get his semen tested to make sure those little swimmers were healthy. I was even encouraged that most women after a HSG got pregnant right away, as the tubes were then “nice and clean.” Unfortunately I was one of the many ladies that this didn’t happen for. Although my HSG looked great, I was bummed out because then we still were in the dark and without an answer. Brandon got his analysis back from his doctor and it wasn’t quite what we had hoped. In fact, we were both devastated at first. Pretty much every function/quality they checked for his came up under par. Oddly enough, many firefighters seem to have troubles with infertility. Not that that statistic made us feel any better.

So at this point both Brandon and myself were put on Clomid to increase our chances of conceiving. Clomid for Brandon helped to increase his testosterone levels which then increases the quality and quantity of those tiny swimmers. Clomid for me helped to increase the chance of making big enough follicles to then ovulate and get fertilized. About six months of this went by and we were fed up. I was an emotional and hormonal wreck, not only were my poor family having to deal with me but my coworkers and possibly even my patients felt the irritability just radiating off of me. While Brandon’s tests kept coming back better and better I wasn’t getting pregnant. But I was getting hot flashes, mood swings, weight gain, night sweats, headaches, acne (oh lord the acne) and every other side effect known to these meds.

Each month we would increase the dose of Clomid but to no avail. We just weren’t getting pregnant. There was no bun in my oven and it felt as if there was never going to be.. But we knew we had to keep faith that it would some day happen.

We had to do something else….